Did you know that there is a way to treat possessive jealousy? While this feeling is overwhelming, there are ways to get around it to make your relationship healthier.
Even though the ideal is to work on trust between the couple, an acceptable amount of jealousy is usually appreciated by the partners. People like to know that they are loved and wanted, so they believe that an expression of jealousy is like a reaffirmation of the bond between the couple.
However, possessive jealousy is so intense and pervasive that it quickly ruins relationships. Either the couple breaks up and each goes their own way, or the relationship turns into an unhealthy relationship.
possessive and sick jealousy
Could it be that that jealousy I feel isn’t going too far?
The Possessive Jealousy Mechanism
Everyone feels a little uncertain when it comes to relationships. Unloving relationships can also arouse fear of rejection. However, this fear turns to dread when it comes to love. It is born from feelings such as low self-esteem, rejection complex and, above all, fear of losing a love
d one.
But the main fuel of possessive jealousy is insecurity. Insecure individuals do not trust themselves or other people. No matter how much love is shown, they don’t believe it. Excessive insecurity can lead to controlling behaviors as fears are projected onto the partner.
One more ring to answer the cell phone or a few minutes late arriving home are reasons to arouse jealousy. Soon, the sense of ownership grows and the partner’s contact with friends and family, the clothes he wears, the places he frequents and the activities he does besides work start to be monitored.
When we are in a relationship, blinded by passion and expectations, control goes unnoticed (or is denied) in our attitudes. Any harsher word or different behavior is reason to be shaken and put ourselves in the victim’s shoes, after all, it is the partner who is being rude!
In a relationship based on love and trust, these worries are unnecessary. Love, above all, is the softest feeling that we can carry in us and from it only good emotions and sensations arise. And jealousy is far from it.
How about starting to work on issues such as insecurity, confidence and self-esteem?
self-esteem track
How to Treat Possessive Jealousy
Fortunately, you can learn how to deal with possessive jealousy! The journey to healing is a long one, and most likely requires touching poorly healed or still-open wounds. But the peace of mind gained in compensation is incomparable.
1. Think about the meaning of jealousy
Is there really any reason to be jealous? Why do you believe you will be betrayed or abandoned? What happened to make you think about this possibility?
If your partner or partner has conduct that calls into question your faithfulness, you should clarify how you feel about his or her behavior. However, we need to remember that it is impossible to control others. Even if you try, this attitude is doomed to failure.
That’s why we need to have self-confidence and believe that we can handle life’s adversities, including a possible termination. With more confidence, you also make more assertive decisions not based on unfounded suspicions of jealousy.
2. Reflect on your insecurities in the relationship
What are you most afraid of? Be alone? Being rejected? Losing that particular person? Never find anyone again if the relationship ends? Not being loved? Anyway, there are several insecurities present in love relationships and these are usually the most common.
Many of them are the result of anxiety, which creates a terrible future for you and your partner when all is well in the present. Therefore, it is necessary to make an effort to keep attention in the current moment. Assess the relationship as it stands today, not what it might be like if X or Y were to happen.
overcoming anxiety
3. Don’t get attached to the past
Excessive jealousy may be a defense mechanism developed in the past to prevent suffering. While revisiting bad memories can be painful, it’s likely that you need to do this to get rid of fears clinging to a time that has passed.
Regardless of whether you were betrayed, rejected, or had a bad childhood experience related to it, today you are a different person. Stronger, more aware and more mature. There is no reason to spend the rest of your life waiting for the past to repeat itself. See life through the eyes of who you are today and not the person you were yesterday.
4. Participate in your partner’s life
Learning how to deal with possessive jealousy requires making significant changes in relationship dynamics. Instead of being suspicious and restricting your partner, invite them to do something fun or do something that interests them.
Participate in his life the way you would like him to participate bake yours. Thus, the bond between you will be strengthened between laughter and joyful moments.
Possessive jealousy and healthy relationship
Restore mutual trust by recovering intimate and fun moments for both
5. be sincere
Honesty and dialogue are two very important pillars of any relationship. If the partner is not open-minded, start this culture yourself. Express your feelings whenever you feel it is necessary.
Do not allow them to accumulate within you and then manifest later in an outburst of anger. Solve all impasses instantly!
Likewise, don’t make the wrong accusations or raise your voice. The best way to approach sensitive topics is calmly and willingly to listen to your partner’s thoughts.
